SEE Member Stories
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A SEE Story: Redefining Mother-Daughter Bond through SEEing the Value of Each Other
SEE Author: Danty Yin
Published Date: Apr 22, 2024
After a draining academic conference, Monday morning found me buried in work until my mom called unexpectedly. What was meant to be a 15-min catch-up stretched into a two-hour conversation filled with laughter, a rarity between us.
Initially, her charge on saying something like I should not greet a senior researcher like the way I did irked me, a familiar trigger for our clashes. Yet, instead of being too angry, I prayed for more patiences when talking to my mom and that my prayer was heard. I was able to calmly share more, what I did and why I did not buy the senior researcher lunch – the culture norm was different.
The action of not paying lunch for an old friend means “caring too much about money” in her culture but “treating each other equally and paying for my own lunch” in the culture where I work.
Something shifted as my mom listened. She started to share stories of her own career and life, and how she avoided being seen as “stingy” by others, adding understanding rather than judgment. I started to feel that she gave advice in good attention and that I was SEEN and respected. In that exchange, our dynamic changed. No longer was she an authority figure, but a companion on my journey.
For me, it was a revelation, feeling truly heard and valued. And for her, my willingness of talking to her in hours bonded us even across long distance (more than 7,000 miles, as we live in two countries).
As the call ended, a warmth lingered, a reminder of the power of SEEing the value of each other to transform even the busiest of days into moments of profound connection and love.
Word Count: 288 words
The Sunflower Education InstitutE 